LIVESTRONG DAY...

I got an email from Livestrong today regarding their "Livestrong Day"...

Here is the link....

LIVESTRONG DAY... Livestrong Foundation

All is Put To Right....

So, the Polk County Transit was highly dismayed to hear about how I was treated during what I now call "The Phone Call". They sent a representative over to the house to interview Raymond and he is now approved for his transportation. I'm glad they did the right thing.

Therefore, his second round of treatment started today.  Again, he is wiped out from it and his head hurts.  Luckily, he still has some of the pain pills left that my sisters bought for him. Four more days of the chemo and another week of the migraines and he'll have another two weeks of peace.

I asked the doctor today when we can officially call him "cancer-free" and she said, "After the chemo treatments are over, we'll do more scans and bloodwork to make sure it's all gone."  She sounded really optimistic when she said it.  Personally, I think it's "gone" now, but they are just making sure. The only thing that worries me is the fact that it's a "very aggressive" cancer and that sentence she said about it showing signs that it had "infiltrated the blood vessels" around where they had removed the mass.  I'm still unclear as to if she meant that it actually DID infiltrate or that it COULD HAVE infiltrated.  Either way, the chemo is going as planned and the lung/stomach scans were clear, with the exception of an enlarged lymph node... no, a "larger than normal" lymph node (meaning she wasn't overly concerned, but wasn't willing to take a chance with it, either).

So, it's off to bed for me.  Have to rest up to make phone calls tomorrow on Raymond's behalf plus another round of sitting in the hospital for the day.

Oh, yeah... received information from Patient Advocate Center.  Great resource for cancer patients (see address and phone # on HELPFUL WEBSITES page)

RAYMONDSHOPE MONTHLY FUNDRAISING EFFORT:

VERY IMPORTANT & SERIOUS POST 

Well, today is the day that I have to set my pride aside to do what is right for my son. I am a very independent person and do not like to ask for help. In fact, I will exhaust every avenue first before I do. But cancer is unforgiving and does not allow me the luxury of procrastinating and putting off what must be done.  

The state of Florida is still requesting information and waiting on medical records and whatever other red tape that they can come up with to put off approving Raymond's medicaid application. He had to resort to Polk County Health Plan which, as anyone on any county run insurance plan knows, pays for virtually nothing. They are not covering his pain medications, which the oncologist called in for a preauthorization for, nor one of his antinausea medications. Those two alone are $85.00 for a 10 day supply. He has 4 months worth of chemo to go through, which is causing migraine headaches and nausea as expected. Therefore, at $85.00/10 days for 4 months, we are looking at $1040 just for the meds.  As per my usual M.O, I am seeking other avenues to cover the meds such as placing an application for free or reduced meds through the manufacturers of them. However, in the meantime, my son is holding his head in pain. Anyone who has ever had a migraine can relate. The one nausea medication that the health plan does cover is helping some, but the oncologist said that the two nausea meds she prescribed really work in tandem to be the most effective. 

Another expense we are running into is the hospital bills that are starting to pour in already from the surgery and subsequent care since January. The chemotherapy and all related expenses are now being covered by Winter Haven Hospital, bless their souls! But the bills prior to chemotherapy are still our responsibility.

Then there is the transportation costs of getting to the treatments daily. He has finally gotten approved for Polk County Transit, which will take him from now on to his treatments and to his related medical appointments, but since January our neighbor, Paul Currie (another kind soul) and a friend, Dakkota Dudzik, have been our main sources of transportation. I have given both of them gas money when I can, but I'd really like to be able to fill each of their tanks at least once to show our gratitude.

Our air conditioner for the house needs a freon charge, but it's not broken so the landlord has suggested that we "get fans" to stay cool as he refuses to pay for what he considers "creature comforts". Under normal circumstances I would agree, but Raymond's chemo meds raise his core body temperature to begin with and we live in sunny Florida that is already peaking 80 degree temperatures most days. Therefore, on top of writhing in pain and feeling the nausea, he is also sweating bullets when he tries to rest... and he is extremely fatigued, as you can imagine.

Towards the goal of paying for all of the above plus whatever else comes up, and to alleviate the added pressure of financial strain, I have started a fundraiser to run for a month at a time called "Raymondshope." You can find the link at the top of the column to the right of the posts. I am very much hoping that I will only need the extra help for one month and that everything will fall into place with the other resources I am seeking. Lord knows, the economic times being what they are, not many of us can afford donations of any kind. Please consider helping my son financially if you are able, but if you are not, the page has a section called "Hugs" where you can just leave words of encouragement and even advice on who we can turn to for help during this trying time. 

And now, as I knew would happen, my cheeks are beginning to feel hot and my pride is a bit bruised and I am embarassed to be having to ask for any type of handout but, being a mother, we do anything necessary (within the constraints of the law and morality, of course) for our children.

Thank you so much for listening!

It's Official....

Well, it's official. Raymond's chemotherapy starts on Monday @8:30am.

His pulmonary function test indicated that his lungs are not strong enough for one of the chemo drugs, so he has to do the other 2 chemo drugs 5 times/week for one week out of each month for 4 months. He has to do 4 cycles of the chemo.  

He was all irritated the other day, so I didn't bring it up to the doctor, but when I can get her by herself away from him, I'm going to ask her what the CAT scan of his lungs showed.  She seemed concerned. And she wanted to do CAT scan of his abdomen, but by this time, he was tired, irritated, and just wanted to go home. He promised me that he would let her do the abdomen CAT on Monday. She said she needs to get a "baseline" before the chemo starts.

So, keep him in your prayers especially this week. Pray that God give him the strength he needs to endure the coming week.

Already, I have to call Polk County Healthcare because they're not covering 2 of the 3 prescriptions that the doc wrote for him.  

I Reached Out...

Well, I sent a link to this blog to all of Raymond's family members in Pennsylvania. To the ones that I could find on Facebook, that is. His brother has hidden himself well. He has a facebook account, but is not even visible as a friend on his grandmother, wife, step-mom, aunts, uncles, or their friends lists. His name is Clayton John Young, he is a U.S. Marine-stationed in North Carolina to my knowledge, his wife's name is Sasha Young, and he is from New Castle Pennsylvania.  If anyone knows how to reach him, please send him a link to this blog. 

My nephew, Jordan, has moved in with us. It'll be a big help once Raymond starts his chemotherapy. Raymond enjoys his company, plus it gives him someone to hang out with that is his own age. I think it's important for his spirits to stay upbeat.

Having a hard time tonight...

Listening to some music tonight, thinking back over the 24 years that my life has been blessed with my son. I'm having a hard time because I hate the prospect of outliving him. Parents aren't supposed to outlive their children. It's not the balance of things. If anyone was gonna get cancer in this family, it should be me not him. 

Times like this is when I find myself questioning the fairness of life in general and, I must admit, my faith in God. I know He gives us tests our whole life to make us stronger and to remind us that He is almighty. But, damn it, if I fail this test, it's Raymond that loses the most! Is it really fair to him for God to be giving me this test? No, it isn't! If God wanted to test my faith by using cancer, then I should have been the one to get it, not Raymond, and I'm damn angry about it!! 

We see the urologist tomorrow. Not sure what wonderful, f-ing news we'll get from him. I know it won't be good news, if I keep questioning my faith like this so I better get off of here and go bend the good Lord's ear for awhile and make amends for my doubt before He takes it out on m son.

Well, good news and bad news...

Might as well give bad news first:

We went to the oncologist yesterday.  Raymond's cancer is a very aggressive type of cancer. He will have to undergo chemotherapy for 4 months @ 1 treatment per week. Regrettably, he will be very sick and tired for the next 4 months. We would love to read as many blog post comments as you care to post. Words of encouragement are always welcome. Prayers are even more welcome and are essential to get him through this.

Now for the good news:

His cancer, although aggressive, is completely curable. Thank you, Jesus!! It may even be that there isn't any cancer left in him, as the surgeon does believe that they got it all.  But, to be absolutely 100% positive that it's all gone, they're going ahead with the chemo. I'm choosing to believe that God has a plan for him and that Raymond is going through this to make him a stronger person in preparation for that. God knows each of our strengths and weaknesses, just like any father knows his children, and He never gives us more than we can handle. This is going to make Raymond stronger as a person, myself stronger as a mother, and the both of us will be better off for it. We just need moral support and prayers for all of you willing to give it.

This was the last thing I expected to hear...

My son was diagnosed with testicular cancer on January 17, 2013.  I was completely and totally shocked.  He is only 24 years old.  He had surgery to remove the mass on January 25th. He's feeling a little better.  He still has pain, but not as intolerable as it was. He is trying to stay in high spirits, since we don't have the final diagnosis (benign or malignant).  He has an extremely good sense of humor and that is helping him to keep up a good front.  Being his mom, I know that inside he is fearful and unsure of what will happen next.  We can only take it a day at a time, pray, and put it in God's hands. 
Although the surgeon did say that it appears to be malignant, we're still keeping optimistic and praying that it is benign.  See, fibroid tumors run in my family so there is still a chance that the mass is no more than a fibroid or fatty tumor.  The surgeon assured us that he removed it all.  The only reason he would need to have chemo or radiation is if the biopsy reveals a malignancy.  *Fingers-crossed and eyes to Heaven*....

Here's my Sonshine, just this past summer, working hard to build me a pond....

  
And here he is being silly, like usual...

What makes this especially hard on him (as if the illness itself isn't hard enough), is that I called his Grandma Young (Jean Young of Ellwood City PA) to have her relay the message to his dad, who he hasn't spoken to in about 2 years.  His dad didn't even bother to contact him back.  They have been at odds for years, and his dad pretty much disowned him. Raymond hasn't lived his life the way his father thinks he should have, nor has he accomplished anything that they'd write about in the history books, so he's not worthy of being called "son" by Raymond A. Young,Sr. Despite this, Raymond still loves his dad and would like to have a chance to make things right and repair the relationship before it's too late.  What a sad testimonial to a young man's life when his own father can't swallow his pride and bury the hatchet to reunite with his son, given the circumstances.  Well, all I know is that Raymond and I have our differences, but this is one parent who will NEVER give up on him no matter what he says or does.  He is flesh of my flesh, blood of my blood and I'm very proud to call him my son! Life is too short to hold grudges against a loved one.